The Woman/Transcript
Sherlock Holmes: Irene? Irene. Irene. Irene! Irene Adler: Door's open. Hi. You must be the P.I. Holmes: Consulting detective, yes. Sherlock Holmes. Adler: Consulting detective? Is that different from a P.I.? Holmes: There's considerably less clandestine photography of cheating spouses, yeah. Uh, as I mentioned in my e-mail, I'm looking into a matter for a friend of mine who procures items for auction at Christie's. Now, Mr. Kirby of the British Museum said that as his top restorer, you were the person to see. Adler: Nice of Mr. Kirby. Irene Adler. Nice to meet...oh. You're beautiful. Symmetry, I'm trained to be on the lookout for it. Holmes: Hmm. Adler: Anyway, I looked at those pictures you e-mailed. Tell your friend at Christie's that, I'm sorry, but those canvasses aren't original Turners. Holmes: You're certain? The provenance is quite convincing. Adler: Yeah. They're good forgeries but, you know, they're forgeries. They're supposed to be the studies for "The Fighting Temeraire", but they have a medium orange and ochre in them. In 1839, you needed turmeric to make ochre paint. But 1839 was also the beginning of your Afghan war, the army commandeered turmeric for a preservative in rations. That's why you don't see ochre in "The Fighting Temeraire". Or any painting from back then. Holmes: Hmm. I'm surprised I hadn't realized that. Yet. Adler: Shame, really. The world would be a more interesting place with a few new Turners in it. Holmes: So these are all your work, are they? Adler: Mm-hmm. Holmes: Hmm. You're very gifted. Do you do original work? Adler: What could I add to all this? What could anyone? Holmes: Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to linger, I just, it's just if these were all supposed to be reproductions, what is the original of Brueghel's "The Blind Leading the Blind" doing on your wall? I wonder what the director of the Belgian National Museum would have to say if he knew that you had returned your work to him and passed it off as the real thing. Adler: How could you possibly know that? Holmes: The original was damaged by shelling during the Great War. Hard to see why you, a restorer by trade, would recreate the gouges in the canvas. I'm curious, you don't intend to sell it, so why take the risk? Adler: The museum director wanted to file down the paint where the gouges were. I told him that that would compromise what the artist intended, but he didn't see it my way, so I preserved it. Holmes: I see. And some of these other paintings are preserved as well, are they? Hmm. A bargain then. I'll tell you which of the paintings are reproductions and which of them are counts of felonious theft. And if I deduce correctly, you'll spend an evening in this great city with me. Adler: You're not going to turn me in? Holmes: I appreciate your efforts to keep the vulgarities of the modern era at bay. Whether you agree to my game or not, I'll leave you to your work. I assure you, we would enjoy each other's company. I have no wish to coerce your attentions. Adler: You're not boring at all, are you? Holmes: I make every effort not to be. Adler: I accept, but I do have one question. I've already told you that you're beautiful, and I can see the way you're looking at me. Why would we need to leave this apartment to enjoy each other's company? Holmes: A game with proper stakes then. Shall we? Hmm. Dr. Del Santo: Ms. Adler, I understand you're disoriented, but it really is 2013. Adler: No. Mr. Stapleton told me it was my birthday seven different times. Del Santo: He was lying. Joan Watson: I'm here, if you want to talk. I can't even imagine what you must be thinking right now. Hey. Captain Gregson: Hey. Watson: What did you find at the house? Gregson: Not much of anything yet. CSU's there with Bell. Is that her? That's Irene? Del Santo: I, uh, your friend is fine. Physically. But if I had to put a name on it, I would say that she's suffering from severe post-traumatic stress. Watson: What happened to her? Del Santo: She doesn't remember everything clearly, but she was abducted, moved from place to place. There were five that she told me about. And then she was subjected to advanced psychological pressure tactics. Seems that somebody had set out to systematically destroy this young woman's personality, and, for the life of me, I cannot give you a reason why. Watson: Did she talk about the people who took her? Del Santo: She dealt with only one person. He named himself Mr. Stapleton. By day, he tinkered with her mind, left white peonies by her bed at night. Punishment, reward, all designed to make Ms. Adler psychologically dependent on her captor. Gregson: Did you get a description of Mr. Stapleton? Del Santo: She said he was white, about five-ten, but as far as what he looked like, she drew this. He was wearing it every time she spoke to him. I've given her a sedative, and we're gonna keep her on a psych hold for a few days. Watson: Thank you, Doctor. Holmes: It's odd to hear that man wonder why this happened to Irene. It was because of me. Moriarty wanted me to believe that she was dead, let me mourn her, get addicted to heroin. And then when I made steps towards recovery, he sends her back to me. Well part of her. Yeah, where'd all her blood come from? How did I not know that she was alive? What, what did I miss? Watson: Can you give us a minute? Gregson: Oh, yeah. Sure. Watson: Irene has been hurt badly, but she's alive and she can get better. You can help her. Holmes: Yes, of course. Whatever she needs. Watson: We've got clues. We can go and find that man. We can go back to the house... Holmes: No, uh, I shan't be consulting on Irene's case. Watson: Do you really want to sit this one out? Holmes: I need to look after her. Besides, I don't think I'd be much use. Moriarty is quite clearly smarter than I am. A man should know when he's beaten. Holmes: This is where we live. I'll show you where you'll be staying. Watson: Um, your room is right next to the kitchen. I brought you some things to wear. Watson: How do you think she's doing? Holmes: She seems less disoriented than before. She has a few questions about this Moriarty character, but don't we all? Watson: Have you heard from her family yet? I don't expect to. The uncle who raised her died shortly before we met. Her brother was enjoying an extended adolescence in Thailand the last time we'd heard of him. Watson: Should we talk about a plan? Holmes: I look after her. Watson: No. I know. I mean...should we talk about how that's gonna work? I mean, I want to help out any way that I can. Look, do you even want me around? Is it too crowded in here? I, I can start looking for my own place. Holmes: Uh, no. This is your home. I, I, I don't have any answers for you, I'm afraid. We'll have to figure this out as we go along. I do know that I want you to work. We've been in the hospital for three days. And if you're going to help find the people who took Irene, you need to get cracking. Watson: Well, I've never consulted without you before. Holmes: Well, I am confident that Captain Gregson and Detective Bell can handle the transition neatly. Excuse me. You lurk. Watson: I do. I'm not your sober companion anymore. But I know a relapse trigger when I see one. Have you talked to Alfredo? Holmes: I have no need of a sponsor to keep me from turning to heroin. I have my duties. Now go. My water turns hot, your case grows cold. Gregson: Holmes really isn't coming, huh? Watson: No. He wants to take care of Irene. I mean, if things were normal, I'd say, there's no way he sits out an entire investigation, but right now, who knows? He's really thrown by all this. Gregson: Yeah, well, that makes two of us. Let me ask you something. You believe this guy is real? Moriarty? Watson: I do. Detective Bell: No Holmes? Well, finally tracked down the owner. I don't think we're gonna learn too much from him. He's nine, and he lives in Austria. Kid's never even seen the place. He inherited it from his uncle when he was three years old. Trust paid for a caretaker to come out a couple times a year. The caretaker didn't see anything, either. They must not have held her here that long. Watson: Did you find anything when you looked around? Bell: Well, nothing much. That Stapleton guy had to know you were coming. He cleaned the place out. No one who lives in the area saw anyone coming or going. Watson: Oh. Bell: Hmm? You got something? Watson: Maybe nothing. Um, I have these reading assignments. It's part of my training with Sherlock. Lately, it's been about art, how it's forged, stolen, sold on the black market. I just read about this color, gamboge. Bell: See, I usually just go with yellow. Watson: Well, it's the kind of yellow. See how bright the pigment is? Gamboge comes from a resin. It's harvested in these trees. It's found in Southern Vietnam, Cambodia, Thailand. It takes a long time to harvest, so it's rare, and so is this brand. I'm guessing there's only a handful of places in New York that carry it. Somebody had to buy this for Irene, right? If we figure out where it came from, maybe we can find out who was watching her. Bell: Feels just like having Holmes here, doesn't it? Holmes: Miss Adler. Adler: Sherlock Holmes, P. I. Hi. Holmes: Uh, apologies for the ambush. I was just, I arrived just as you were leaving. Adler: No problem. What's up? Holmes: Yes, well, it's been several weeks since our meeting-turned-interrogation turned sexual marathon. A memorable afternoon and evening. I'm sure you'd agree. Yet, each time I've tried to arrange for an encore, I've been politely, but unmistakably rebuffed, as if your right, of course. Although, I admit, I'm not accustomed to rebuffings. Adler: You're not accustomed to being on the receiving end of rebuffings. Holmes: Quite so. It seems to me, we had an experience worth repeating. Just, I'm curious as to why you differ. Adler: I don't differ. I reject your whole premise. Our afternoon was one of the most unique and memorable of my life. It can't be repeated. We could try, but that's just a game of diminishing returns, isn't it? I'd rather just remember it the way it was. Holmes: You preserve the integrity of the initial encounter by denying yourself further ones. Interesting. Adler: People don't treasure things anymore. You should try it. Holmes: You're not boring at all, are you? Adler: I try not to be. Holmes: What if I could offer you another entirely unique experience? Surely, that would be worth pursuing. Adler: Unique is a high bar to clear. Holmes: I'm fully aware of that. But if you're not concerned about keeping your clothes clean, I'm quite confident this would fit the bill. Adler: I did not know there were tunnels underneath Camden Market. Holmes: Yeah. Well, they're closed to the public, 'cause they've got the unfortunate habit of flooding every now and again. I was working on a case where I was required to spend quite a bit of time in London's extensive network of underground tunnels and catacombs, so, I made my own map. Um, in doing so, I became convinced there was a quarter mile of undocumented tunnel, which was cut off from its ilk by the cave-in. Now, there was just a simple matter of some unsanctioned work with dynamite to see if I was right or not. Here we are. Adler: Thank you. Uh, should you really be doing that? Holmes: It's fine. I put the sign here myself. Can't have spelunkers poking around there, can we? Shall we? Adler: What is this place? Holmes: It's a canal. It dates back to the Roman occupation of Britain. Those are prayer tablets. See? They're messages from Roman citizens to their gods. They date back millennia. Adler: Hmm. Holmes: You and I are the only two people who know about these. Adler: No! No! Holmes: Irene. Irene. Adler: He changed the rules again. Mr. Stapleton, he changed the rules, and he didn't tell me. No! God, no! Holmes: I'll get some water. Adler: Sherlock, come, come sit with me. Tell me how you've been. What was the last year and a half of your life like? You moved to New York. There must be a story there. Watson: Hey, I'm back! Holmes: I should see if she's learned anything. Watson: How is she? Holmes: Uh, I don't know. Maybe a hair better. What news from the front? Watson: Well, I learned that there is such a thing as a nine-year-old Austrian real estate tycoon. Other than that, nothing. Watson (phone): Hi, Captain. Gregson (phone): Your gamboge tip paid off. That pigment you found came from a specialty supply store in Tribeca called Halcyon Paints. They sold one package of it in the past few weeks, to a guy named Duane Proctor. Did a five-year stretch a while back for assault with a deadly weapon. Watson (phone): Do you know where he is? Gregson (phone): His PO says he's been crashing with his brother since he got out. We're on our way to talk to him right now. Isaac Proctor: Look, I'm sorry, I just don't think that there's any way Duane had anything to do with, what exactly are you talking about? An abduction? Bell: Well, he did do a stint in Sing Sing, yeah? Isaac: Duane has made a genuine effort to reform himself. Look, I wouldn't let him stay at the house if I didn't believe that. I tutor kids here. Detective Muldoon: Captain, he just pulled up. Gregson: Sit tight. Muldoon, stay with him. Gregson: Duane Proctor? Captain Gregson, NYPD. Duane Proctor: What's going on here? Gregson: We were wondering if we could ask you a few questions about Irene Adler. Duane: I'm supposed to know who that is? Bell: Yeah, I kind of doubt you kidnapped her and never asked her name. Duane: What? What the hell are you guys talking about? Bell: Hey, don't waste our time, man. The paint you bought, the yellow paint, Irene was using that when we found her. Duane: Yellow paint? Okay, I bought some paint and brushes and stuff, but I don't know this Irene whoever. I bought that stuff for Isaac. My brother. He's a tutor. One of his kids needed some supplies for an art project or something? Gregson: Stay with him. Wait, wait, wait. Whoa, whoa. Okay, open, open. Ho! You hit? Call it in! Call it in! Muldoon: No, he went out the back! Gregson: All right, just lay down, lay down. Tell 'em to put out a BOLO for Isaac Proctor. We came looking for the wrong brother. Duane: I don't know why my brother did what he did. I didn't even know he had a gun. Bell: We found a small arsenal in that locker in his garage. He had guns, silencers, passports under three different names. Duane: And I am just as confused about this as you are. My brother was the good one. He was the smart one. Before he was tutoring kids, he worked in a freakin' think tank. Bell: He ever mention a guy named Moriarty? Duane: We went to high school with a guy named Maury Goldberg. Bell: No. It's one name, a last name. Moriarty. Duane: Isaac never mentioned him. If he did, I would tell you. I don't want to go back to prison, man. Adler: I'm sorry. I don't know his face, and I don't know his voice. If he ever came to the house I was in, I don't remember it. Gregson: What about his brother Isaac? Adler: I'm sorry. I, I just can't tell. Watson: It's okay. It's brave of you to just come down. Holmes: If that's all there is, I think we'd best be going. Yeah, come on, hm? Okay. Gregson: It's weird to see him walk away from a case. I mean, don't, don't get me wrong, I get it. It's just weird. Watson: Well, how's the detective doing that got shot? Gregson: Six broken ribs, punctured lung. Watson: He's lucky he was wearing his vest. Gregson: He's lucky the perp decided to shoot him there. The weapons we found were modified. They had suppressors. Tells me Isaac Proctor is a pro. He could've killed Muldoon if he chose to. Watson: So what now? Gregson: We keep digging into Isaac's background, see if we can't connect him to Holmes's pal. In the meantime, his picture's still out there. It's not much, but it's where we start. Duane: Ten messages before you call me back? Lieutenant: I had to explain your situation to Moriarty. It took some time to make contact. How did the police find you? Duane: I don't have any idea. Look, my face is all over the news, can you help me or not? Lieutenant: Of course we can. But we need you to run an errand. It involves Sherlock Holmes. Adler: You're doing that now? Really? Holmes: We've just had sex. My brain is awash with neurochemicals. This is a particularly vexing case. Adler: "M." Holmes: Mmm. I still can't determine the method with which he chooses his victims. But the only consistency is the means by which he executes them. He hangs their bodies from a tripod device, like this, and then... Adler: Drains their blood. I remember. Is this all I am now? A piece of exercise equipment for your brain? Holmes: You're the greatest piece of exercise equipment a man could ever hope to throw a leg over. Adler: That's Keats, right? Holmes: You're right. I'm being terribly rude. Adler: Yes, but you're typically quite rude. I'm trying to figure out why it doesn't bother me. Holmes: 'Cause you're rude. Well, I mean, you're you're honest. Simple minds he always confused great honesty with great rudeness. Adler: Mmm, you know I'm not releasing any more neurochemicals, right? Holmes: You know these these birthmarks, they are almost exactly the same shape as the constellation Auriga. Adler: Is that a good thing or bad? Holmes: Well, it's, I'm just, I'm surprised I've never noticed before. Even after all this time, you're something of a blind spot to me. Adler: You say the sweetest things. Holmes: I like that I don't see everything. It's rare. By the way, I've been meaning to ask you, um, why haven't you told me about your new project? Adler: We talked about the Rubens the other day. Holmes: No. The other new project. Well, the Rubens has a very, very particular palette. The last few times we've met, you've had flecks of paint of very different colors on your hands. Also, the guest bedroom's been locked the last few times I've been here, which leads me to believe that is where the new work resides. So could it be an Irene Adler original? 'Cause I distinctly remember you saying that you had absolutely nothing to contribute to the medium. Adler: That was months ago. I feel differently now. Holmes: What's changed? I really just I'd like to take a look at it. Adler: You'll see it when it's ready. Holmes: Can I get you anything? Adler: I'm fine, thanks. This must be difficult for you. Holmes: Sorry? Adler: Having me here. I know how much you see. I can only imagine what you must be picking up right now. Holmes: You know, you're the only person I ever empathized with. Adler: Empathy. You have changed. Holmes: You asked me the other day what my life's been like. Um, you may recall, over the course of our relationship, that I dabbled with the occasional narcotic. They were a hobby, and after your demise they became a good deal more than that. Yeah. A way of life, really. Adler: Sherlock... Holmes: I was, I was broken. I was I thought the drugs were helping, and they were not. When I couldn't find the man who I thought had killed you, I, I just I hit a bottom. Scotland Yard asked me to step aside. I ended up coming here to New York to hide. When my father realized the depths to which I had sunk, he forced me into rehab. Adler: You're better now. Holmes: I'm sober now. I'll always be an addict. I'm sorry, I, uh, I would like to be able to say that I honored your memory. In fact, I did quite the opposite. Please know that I hold myself 100% accountable for everything that has happened to you. It is unlikely that I will ever be able to make that up to you but you have my word that I will never stop trying. Adler: You were broken. You fixed yourself. If the great Sherlock Holmes can do it, then you give me hope. Aaah! He was here. Mr. Stapleton was here. Adler (voice mail): Sherlock, it's ready. My original piece is finally ready, and you have an exclusive invitation to view it. I'm out of town for a few more days but will return on Friday. Meet me at my place by 5:00, or into the fireplace it goes. Holmes: Hello? I realize I'm late, but I have the most dazzling of excuses. Adler: I thought you were taking me someplace safe. Holmes: This is an old garage. I assure you it's a good deal more than that. Come on. I received this property as payment for some work I did when I first arrived in New York. Had intended to sell it but then I realized it might make a passable safe house in case of emergency. Adler: Are you sure we weren't followed? Holmes: I'm positive. I followed every counter-surveillance procedure known to man, and then some known only to me, so I promise you, you're quite safe here. Adler: What about your house? Shouldn't we call the police? Holmes: Well, I have done, after a fashion, I've texted Watson. She's handling it. The scene will be processed. Adler: It doesn't make any sense. This Moriarty, he let me go. He told you were to find me, so why would his people leave that flower on my pillow. Holmes: It was a message, obviously. Adler: Why would he send me a message? Holmes: The message was for me. It could not have been clearer. He wants me to understand that as long as you're in my life, you can and will be used against me. You are one of the strongest people I have ever met, but next to a will and a mind like Moriarty, you're weak. And because I care for you I'm also weak. That's why I need to let you go. Adler: What? Holmes: I'm sorry, you can't stay here. We need to send you far away. Somewhere you can really be safe. When I have finished with Moriarty, I'll come find you. Adler: You make it sound so easy. Holmes: The notion of causing you additional hardship, it pains me to my core. Adler: Sherlock, I'm afraid. And we've only just found each other again after all this time. Holmes: I see no other way to protect you. Adler: What if I see another way? Bell: Isaac Proctor. He changed his look, but that's him. If there was ever any doubt he was connected to what happened to Ms. Adler, there isn't anymore. Gregson: We got all the cameras out of your Brownstone, right? Watson: Um, all the ones he told me about. I mean, this doesn't make any sense. I mean, why go to all this trouble? Why mess with Irene's head? I mean, all the evidence says that Isaac Proctor is a professional, not a psychopath. Bell: I got to figure he's still following orders, right? Gregson: Right. Have you heard from Holmes yet? Watson: I left him three messages and a few texts. N.D. Detective: Captain. Got Holmes for you on line one. Gregson: Okay. About time. Thank you. Gregson (phone): Holmes, where the hell are you? Hello? Hello? Why didn't he call my cell? Watson: Maybe he'll call you back. Um, I'm gonna get a coffee. Does anyone want anything? Gregson: No. No, thank you. Watson: Where's Irene? Holmes: Safe. Watson: You want to explain all the cloak and dagger? Holmes: I trust Captain Gregson and Detective Bell implicitly. But given the scope of Moriarty's operation, the fewer people who know about my whereabouts the better. Watson: Well, a few things you need to be caught up on. Remember when Duane Proctor said his brother worked at a think tank? We looked into it. Turns out it's really a CIA front. So Isaac Proctor worked for them as an interrogator in the late '90s, his specialty was psychological pressure tactics. Holmes: You think we may have found our Mr. Stapleton? Watson: I know we have. Isaac was the one who left the flower on Irene's pillow tonight. We caught him on one of your security cameras. And I noticed something, he came in through the kitchen door and made a beeline for Irene's room. He knew exactly where she was staying. How could he know that? You think that Moriarty has, has cameras in our house, too? Holmes: Mmm. I suppose with a man like him, anything is possible. Watson: What do you mean you suppose? We need to figure this out. Holmes: I'm leaving New York, Watson. Watson: What? Holmes: I told Irene that, in order to be safe, she needed to go elsewhere. She said she would only do so if I accompanied her, so I came to say good-bye. Watson: I don't understand. How, how long will you be gone? Holmes: That's difficult to say. If you could dismantle Moriarty's empire in my absence, thereby guaranteeing Irene's safety, that would go a long way to expediting my return. Watson: Is this what you want or is this what you think you owe? Holmes: I don't think I owe anything. I know it. Her life was ruined because of me. Watson: We are on to something here. We can find Isaac Proctor and that might lead us to Moriarty. Holmes: I'm sorry, Watson. My mind is made up. Watson: This is what Moriarty wants, and if it's what he wants, it's a mistake. Lieutenant: Were you followed? Isaac Proctor: No. Lieutenant: The plates are clean. There's $30,000 and a phone in the glove compartment. You drive to Calgary, and you wait. The next instructions you're gonna get are on the burner, so stay close to it. Isaac: Will I be allowed to call home? Lieutenant: Think this through. If you kill me... Isaac: Shut up. Lieutenant: "Call home." You voice-activated one phone to call the other. Isaac: Metal drum in the trunk. You were gonna use it to get rid of my body. Whose idea? Lieutenant: You were sloppy. The police should never have been able to trace that house back to you, but they did. Moriarty can't abide that. Isaac: Moriarty thinks I was sloppy? Who left standing orders never to hurt Sherlock Holmes? Only reason you're still breathing is so you can report back. Moriarty's obsessed with Holmes. Doesn't want him touched. You tell Moriarty that Sherlock Holmes is a dead man. Holmes: Irene? Adler: I didn't think you'd be gone so long. Holmes: I've been busy. We have a way out. No one will know that we've gone. And they won't know how to find us once they do. There's a Greyhound to Maine. I have a friend there who can get us some passports. Then the trick will be conscripting a boat to take us to Newfoundland. Once we're at St. John's Airport, virtually any destination... Adler: What? Is that as far as you've gotten? It's all right. We don't need to have every move mapped out 20 steps in advance. We can work it out as we...Sherlock? What the hell are you doing? Get off of me! Why would you do that? Holmes: How, how could I have been so stupid? Adler: Sherlock, you're scaring me. Holmes: How long have you been working for him? Adler: What? Holmes: Moriarty. How long have you been working for Moriarty? Adler: You're not making any sense. Holmes: Your constellation, Auriga. One of the stars is missing. Adler: What? Holmes: Your birthmarks. You, you've had one surgically removed. Adler: I don't know what... Holmes: Your birthmarks! Was it, was it, was it precancerous, huh? So you had it removed. You had it removed, not Moriarty, because why would he? Why would he care? Hmm? When did it start? When did it start? Was it before your abduction? Was everything a lie?! Adler: I've never lied to you. You get like this. You get like this. You look at a thing so closely you start to see things that aren't there. You know you do. If you can't trust anyone, if you can't trust me. Please, don't do this. Holmes: Watson asked me. She said, she said, she says how is it that Isaac Proctor knew exactly which was your room in the Brownstone. And now we know. Because you told Moriarty. Adler: You lied before. You don't really want to come with me, so you're inventing a reason not to. You know it's funny. I close my eyes and I try to picture him, and I see someone an awful lot like you. I think you do, too. I think if you weren't so bent on being your enemy, he'd be your friend. When you realize the mistake you've made, don't try and find me. I don't ever want to see you again. Holmes: Watson, change of plan. I'm not going anywhere. There's much we need to discuss. I've returned to the Brown... Isaac Proctor: I apologize, Mr. Holmes. You weren't supposed to see it coming. Holmes: Mr. Proctor. I was wondering when I was going to make your acquaintance. Isaac: Actually, we met once before... Isaac: You know you're only prolonging the inevitable. Holmes: You said we've met before, but I never forget a face. Isaac: I had you at a disadvantage. I was looking at you through a sniper scope. Holmes: So why kill me now? Not then? Isaac: I was under orders that day. Moriarty said you weren't to be harmed. But then, a few hours ago, she tried to have me killed. Holmes: She? Jamie Moriarty: Bet you wish you'd run away with me when you had the chance. Holmes: Moriarty. Category:Transcripts